I need a Mac and Finale Software. Any sponsors?

When finally deciding what career to pursue my first choice was music composition for movie scores, game soundtracks, ect. It doesn't take much to trigger a song in my head and there are times I start composing things without even trying. Random songs are constantly playing in the back of my mind just like a MP3 player stuck on permanent "shuffle" mode.
I've never regretted or resented this gift I've been given, nor the opportunity I took to play the violin from elementary through high school. I still have the instrument my parents purchased for me, although I regret not picking it up more. It's been a wonderful way to outlet my musical ideas and, at times, express emotions I couldn't properly put into words.
But after some prayerful consideration I came to the conclusion that it wasn't really a viable option for me. While I believe I have the natural talent to get started the cost to attend schooling to hone my skills is extremely prohibitive. And I sometimes doubt my lack of commitment to an profession that can take a decade or more to get a break.
That doesn't mean I don't still think about and mentally compose music all the time. There's no switch I can throw to stem the endless tide of new ideas and variations. Most of what generates in my noggin is string quartet or chamber music of the classical variety from the Romantic or Baroque period, with occasional brilliant flashes of John Williams-esque epic orchestral masterpieces. Along with Williams my favorite movie score composers include Hans Zimmer, James Horner, Howard Shore, Randy Newman, Stephan Zacharias, Ennio Morricone and others.
In fact, sometimes I'll go see a movie just because of the score composer. Such is the case with Schindler's List. I was listening to a local classical radio station at age fifteen or so when they were featuring some of John Williams' most famous work and I was absolutely riveted. Hearing Itzhak Perlman pouring his heart and soul into that gorgeous violin solo nearly brought me to tears, and I ran out and bought the soundtrack. That began my infatuation with movie scores. Next was Forrest Gump followed by Mr. Hollands' Opus. More would follow until I started earning enough money to buy the movies.
Flash forward to about 8 years ago when my grandparents gave me a wonderful electric piano with the ability to record, loop, layer and edit without the aid of a computer. I'd been teaching myself to play simple melodies and chord structures and began filling the internal memory with whatever struck a chord. (Pun intended)It was about this time my music tastes really began to include more classic jazz, big band and swing, blues and even bluegrass, which inevitably started influencing my compositional style and range. I still have the piano and would like to see what I can do just as a hobby. Who knows, I could wind up writing a gorgeous choral arrangement, wedding suite or the next movie score!

Fictional writing 1

This post was spawned from an idea I had while waiting for the bus and is completely fictionalized. Enjoy!
I remember the first guy was scared, and justifiably so. He was maybe twenty with olive skin, dark brown eyes and the beginnings of a thick coarse beard. He kept glancing around the room and then closing his eyes and whispering something to himself; probably praying. His clothes were traditional and threadbare but clean. I couldn't help but take pity on him as I escorted him into the interrogation room and closed the door with a solid, metallic click of finality. I knew he wasn't getting out of here. Not with what they had against him.
The second guy seemed to loathe everything and everyone he set his dark blue eyes on. His face was twisted in a scowl and he too was muttering something under his breath but it was more like a threatening hiss. His skin was much darker and he was clean shaven with similar garb but appeared to be a few years younger. He glanced around the rows of desks covered with stacks of paperwork with such contempt it almost unnerved me. He has like a viper that had been harassed and provoked; ready to lash out at any second. He didn't resist as I escorted him down the concrete hallway but I could feel the tensile strength in his arm and was glad when the door locked behind him.

We bought a car!

Friday a friend of mine posted online that she was selling her car. Being without one, my interest was immediately piqued and I made an inquiry but was a bit skeptical about the condition considering the low price. I spoke to my wife and we agreed to go look at it and take it for a test drive.
Saturday morning I got the impression that we really needed to act on this offer, so I tried to instill a sense of urgency in my wife. After speaking with my friend we discovered there was some competition. So we ran to the bank (quite literally) and withdrew the amount plus some extra in case we had a mechanic look at it, with only a few minutes until the bank was due to close!
Upon arriving at the residence where the car was stored we were pleasantly surprised to see the 1999 silver Dodge Neon Sport in excellent condition. The exterior was nearly flawless except for a dusting of pollen and a few small scratches and some tiny rust spots. Inside was equally impressive; the upholstery was dated but free of defects and was recently detailed.
During the test drive we noticed it only had 147,000 miles and pushed it to 40mph without any problem. With only 4 cylinders it didn't get there right away but that's fine with us. Fuel economy will be much improved over the gas-guzzling Beast.
My wife and I felt great immediately after the test drive and decided to purchase it for the asking price, a good $500 below Blue Book value. It was our first major purchase as a couple and love the way it sips fuel, but we're mostly grateful just to have something to drive. Once it gets an alignment, oil change, new tires and brakes I'm sure it'll drive like brand new!

Another year gone?

Generally I turn philosophical this time of year because my birthday falls on the 22nd of this month. I reflect on how quickly another year of life has come and gone and how much progress I've made in the last year as well as life in general. This year is no different except now I post everything online.
So this time last year I was prepping to get married, enjoying the waning days of bachelorhood and despite a few minor things enjoying a fairly comfortable routine. I was also trying to decide what I wanted to do with my life and mulled over several options including studying music to compose for movie scores, acting, joining the military and being a professional writer.
I really had only a small grasp how difficult married life would actually be and suddenly found myself in a trial by fire. There was no lovey-dovey dream honeymoon phase; I was instantly forced to take a hard look at myself and many of my bad habits that put a strain on our relationship that were magnified as soon as my wife moved in. While those have improved over time and I've resolved to correct many of my past mistakes I still have a long ways to go.
My wife and I had initially decided to wait a year to decide to have children but that quickly changed as many of her friends and were getting pregnant or had young children. I'm still a bit hesitant because of our financial situation but at the same time would love to have a child in our home. We are continually amazed by our adorable nephew, now about 18 months. Watching him grow and develop a personality has been a joy and wonder. I understand that raising a child is not all smiles and sunshine. Challenges will arise and I will be tested beyond anything I have yet dealt with. But I feel the joy of bringing someone into the world to learn and grow and become a faithful follower of Jesus Christ is worth whatever obstacles stand in my way.
Another thing I've tried to work on is letting go of the pain of the past and embracing the lessons it offers. Holding grudges does nothing but turn you into a bitter, cynical person and Jesus clearly states that those who do not forgive have the greater sin upon their heads. That doesn't make me a doormat but it also allows me much more freedom from anger and pain for something that may or may not have been intentional. Along with that has been learning to worry only about the things I can control and leaving everything else up to Heavenly Father. If I do what is right and keep my shoulder to the wheel the rest will work itself out.
One thing I know I still struggle with is taking good care of my body. I eat horribly and don't get enough exercise. The will to do better is there, but I lack commitment and discipline.
I guess that's all I can think of at the moment.